Dating marriage and autism a personal perspective hello biscuit dating
If the therapist does not understand the unique differences, all that will happen is the couple going back and forth, arguing for their own view of the situation.And the AS person will have a hard time understanding his/her impact on the NT individual.She could see that I wasn't unwilling to tune into her needs or be more flexible, but rather that I was unable to do those things sufficiently, without her help.There is a huge difference between being unwilling and being unable.There are many successful Aspie-Aspie marriages and Aspie-NT marriages.For the purposes of this article, I am going to cover the subject of Aspie-NT (one adult with Asperger's and one adult who is Neurotypical).you married--and you will--just know this: there is hope. It's so beautiful, so wonderful, it takes your breath away.
So, I started keeping what I called a "journal of best practices," which was a collection of personal maxims that I wrote down and tried to practice everyday: "Don't change the radio station when she's singing along," "Apologies don't count when you shout them," "It's better to fold the laundry than to take only what you need from the dryer," "Don't hog all the crab Rangoon." (Yep. ) Working together, guided by love and my best practices, Kristen and I were able to transform our failing marriage into the happy marriage we'd always wanted.Though we had been best friends since high school, our relationship had been reduced to little more than delicate coexistence.We were both constantly feeling misunderstood, under-appreciated, and resentful towards each other.It didn't take long for me to realize that perhaps there was a connection between the fact that our marriage was in dire straits, and the fact that I had this mild form of autism that manifests itself in ways that tend to destroy relationships. I had always understood that I was different, and I had always felt that I was struggling with things that didn't seem to be a challenge for other people, but I never knew why.Learning as an adult that I fit the Asperger's profile might have been shocking or unsettling. With my diagnosis, I was given insight into how I work.