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Andrew Smiler, Ph D, is a therapist and author residing in Winston-Salem, North Carolina.Smiler holds a Ph D in developmental psychology from the University of New Hampshire and a master’s degree in clinical psychology from Towson University.I’m Audrey Hamilton and this is Speaking of Psychology. Andrew Smiler: That’s a great question and they absolutely want more information than what they’re getting.Andrew Smiler is a therapist and writer living in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. Smiler is the author of the new book “Dating and Sex: A Guide for the 21st Century Teen Boy,” which is published by the American Psychological Association. First off, we know that only about half of American teens get any kind of sexuality education in their middle schools or high schools.He co-authored the book “Challenging Casanova: Beyond the Stereotype of the Promiscuous Young Male.” Smiler is an associate editor (2015-2016) of the APA journal Audrey Hamilton: The sex talk is never an easy conversation.For boys, the questions about sexual consent, average penis size, how to ask someone on a date and how to decide when to have sex are often not asked and thus, unanswered.You break up with her because she told her friend Siobhán about some problems in the bedroom, and because you got sick of hearing about Áine’s problems with her housemate. Now you have to avoid everyone and to make matters worse your friend and her friend are inseparable. The popstar couple, who originally dated in the 90s, also hit back at claims Hannah's now ex fiancé Adam Thomas made in a recent interview, in which he insisted Hannah had labelled Paul 'so fat he could hardly dance' during their two year relationship.
If you’re watching shows or your sons are watching shows like “The Sweet Life of Zach and Cody” or if they’re watching “Harold and Kumar” or even the Avengers movies –there’s never any point in there where the guys actually talk about how relationships work. And I’m also curious how parents can use this book as a way to talk with their sons about this?
At the same time, survey after survey, regardless of whether we’re talking to eighth graders or tenth graders or twelfth graders, about 80-90 percent of teen boys and similar numbers of teen girls tell us that they’ve been in a romantic relationship of some sort.
That’s a much higher percentage than the number of kids who have had sex at any given time or any given age. So boys are really kind of lacking a whole piece of education around how relationships work that girls get.
As a result, boys get their information from the Internet, the movies and their friends and end up coming to their own conclusions about what most guys think. Based on your research and your work with adolescents, do you think boys want more information that goes beyond your typical school health class?
In this episode, we speak with a psychologist about what most guys are really thinking and how that challenges masculine stereotypes. Audrey Hamilton: So, the common assumption about teen boys is that sex is all they think about, right? But there seems to be very little discussion out there about how to talk to boys about sex – romantic relationships. How do they juggle all that’s being thrown at them?